Monday, December 6, 2010

muslims suicide bombers on strike in Britain...

muslim suicide bombers in Britain are set to begin a three-day strike on

Monday in a dispute over the number of virgins they are entitled to in the

Emergency talks with al qaeda have so far failed to produce an agreement.
The unrest began last Tuesday when al qaeda announced that the number of
virgins a suicide bomber would receive after his death will be cut by 25%
this February, from 72 to only 60.

The rationale for the cut was the increase in recent years of the number
of suicide bombings and a subsequent shortage of virgins in the afterlife.

The suicide bomber's union, the British Organization of Occupational
Martyrs (BOOM) responded with a statement that this was unacceptable to
its members and immediately balloted for strike action.

General Secretary abdullah amir told the press, "Our members are literally
working themselves to death in the cause of jihad.

Speaking from his shed in Tipton in the West Midlands, in which he
currently resides, al qaeda chief executive osama bin laden explained,
"We sympathize with our workers concerns, but al qaeda is not in a
position to meet their demands. They are simply not accepting the
realities of modern-day Jihad in a competitive marketplace.

Thanks to Western depravity there is now a chronic shortage of virgins in
the afterlife. It's a straight choice between reducing expenditure and
laying people off. I don't like cutting wages but I'd hate to have to tell
3,000 of my staff that they won't be able to blow themselves up."

Spokespersons for the Union in the north east of England, Ireland, Wales,
and the entire North American and Australian continents stated that the
strike would not affect their operations, as "there are no virgins in
their areas anyway."

Apparently the drop in the number of suicide bombings has been put down to
the emergence of Scottish singing star Susan Boyle - now that muslims know
what an actual virgin looks like they are not so keen on going to